How to Drive

[cannon_fodder]

I am not an expert.  It is true that I have never been in an accident while driving and that I have no tickets... but I am not an expert.  However, I feel like I can give a few pointers to driver's in Tulsa at large that I thought of while reading the road rage thread.  So here we go:


1) You are not in charge of speed enforcement, please stay in the appropriate lane.

2) Appropriate Lanes:
On a three lane highway slower traffic should be in the middle lane if NOT merging or exiting.  Fast traffic and passing traffic in the left lane.  Whenever possible, serve the right most lane for merging traffic and people who slow down way before an exit ramp.

3) On and off of highways:
When exiting a highway, there is usually no need to break before exiting the highway.  In the rare instance that this is required, please inconvenience yourself instead of everyone else by decelerating more rapidly than usual AFTER indicating your exit by use of your blinker.

If a merge lane is provided upon exiting a highway, such as onto 71st, or from the BA onto Harvard - you do NOT have to stop.  You do NOT have to stop.   Keep moving and merge into traffic. Yield sign means use caution, not stop.

Even more importantly, when merging DO NOT STOP.  If you stop it makes it much more difficult to actually merge AND requires everyone behind you to stop.  When you finally do manage to merge you will likely hinder traffic behind you.  On ramps are provided to allow you to get up to highway speed and merge as easily as possible.  Whenever you can, do so and avoid stopping.  

4) Blinker's are supposed to tell people that you are going to turn.  They are not effective if you flip them on AS you are turning, nor are they automatic.  Use of blinkers allows other people to anticipate your actions and take proper measures to avoid an accident and keep traffic flow smooth.

5) Turning:
First, you are allowed to turn right at a red light unless otherwise marked and are actually encouraged to do so.  Apparently less known is the fact that you can turn left from a one way onto another one way.  Both tactics speed traffic flow.  

Another important idea is near lane turning.  When turning onto a four lane road you are suppose to turn into the NEAREST lane possible.  This will allow traffic from the opposite direction to turn at the same time, provided both parties turn into their respective  near lane at the same time.

When turning at a stop light or a stop sign, it is appropriate for you to proceed INTO the intersection while waiting for cross traffic to clear.  In such a way you will be able to complete your turn as soon as traffic clears without having to proceed into the intersection first.  At a red light, if you are in the intersection waiting to turn and the light begins to turn; the proper and LEGAL thing for you to do is to wait for cross traffic to stop and complete your turn (thus not blocking traffic in any direction).

6) Four way stops.  
These are not as complex as you might fear.  At a stop there are two axis, the N axis (for North and South) and the W (for East and West).  The car that is there first, gets to go first.  If two cars on the same axis arrive at the same time they can proceed together.  Any car going straight has right of way over a turning car on the same axis.  

If two cars arrive at the same time on different axis you are to YIELD TO THE RIGHT.  The car on the right gets to go first.  If, as is common, there are multiple cars waiting on all axis it is a turn based system.  Axis N gets to go from both directions at the same time, and then Axis W gets to go from both axis at the same time – always remembering that the car going straight proceeds unimpeded.  

While polite, sitting and waiving each other on does not aid traffic flow.  Follow the rules and just go when its your turn.

7) Roundabouts.  
There are 3 real roundabouts in Tulsa that I know of, however, there are other divides at intersections within neighborhoods that serve as mini roundabouts.  The basic rule at any intersection is you have to turn right no matter where you want to end up.  You have to turn right at the Bartlett fountain and go all the way around if you want to end up facing to the left of your starting position.  

All other traffic rules apply.  Just turn right.

Driving downtown:  
First a very helpful hint: In downtown Tulsa the lights are actually timed correctly.  At about 20 mph you will make the light.  Faster than that and you will stop at every light.

When driving downtown keep in mind that many people are lost.  Still more people are looking for somewhere to park.  And yet others are stopped to make deliveries and such.  Be advised that lane lines and parking spaces are more like suggestions in a downtown area and you should be prepared to improvise when needed to keep traffic moving.  Sorry, the rules are not firm – but that's the way things are in a downtown area.

9) Shooting – it is rarely, if ever, appropriate to shoot at a person or thing from your vehicle nor to shoot AT vehicles at any time.  This should go without saying, but alas...

10) Purpose.  
The purpose of driving is to get you to a destination.  It is not to eat, do your hair, pluck eye brows, shave, sexual activities, or talk on the phone.  If and when doing these things interferes with your or another's intended purpose of driving – that is to say getting to a destination, then you need to cease said activity.  I don't care if you do it, so long as it does not impede the purpose.

11) Rubber Neck
Rubber Necking refers to people who slow down and risk more accidents by gawking at accidents that have already occured (often in the other lane).  Don't do this.  Keep driving.  You can glance and see what you can see as you drive by and please slow down or stop if not doing so is dangerous.  But when the accident is on the other side of a divided highway never, ever, slow down to look at it.  I hate you.

12) Bicycles.  
You are not a car.  I appreciate that rules allow you to operate on the roads under normal traffic laws.  However, I remind you again that you are not a car.  If you are not capable of going the stated speed limit please get the over so I may pass.  Thanks for saving the world, but don't slow me down while you do it.  This rule applies to biker Foxes as well as cycling Santas.

13) Emergency Vehicles.  
It is our duty and the law to get out of the way of emergency vehicles.  However, this does not always entail stopping right where you are.  It is best to get over to the right and THEN stop.  At intersections it works well if everyone in fact just stops so the cop/ambulance/limo with Bob Stoops can just go around the traffic at the intersection – HOWEVER, if you see a problem develop and the vehicle can not get through, you may have to turn right just to clear a lane.  Go ahead, make the sacrifice.

Also worth noting, if an emergency vehicle is not on the same street, turning onto your street, or on the other side of a divided road/highway – you don't have to get over.  Continuing down the BA West will not impede an East Bound ambulance in any way.  For that matter, on the freeway just get over, don't stop.

14) Traffic is waiting 2 hours to go from exit 14A to exit 14B in Houston, not your 25 minute 30 mile drive in to Tulsa from Owasso.  

And 15)  Not a rule, but as a matter of personal preference:  I don't care if your child is an honor student, a soccer player, or if your kid can beat up mine.  Nor do I care to hear your Honda from 6 blocks away because you spent $1K taking off a perfectly good tailpipe.  For that matter, don't spend money on rims, stereos, and paint until your car runs right.  I don't want to hear you ***** about gas prices as you fill up your suburban.  No, you probably don't NEED to drive a truck. Playing Mariachi music loudly does not make me think you're cool, nor any other music for that matter.  If your car is blowing enough smoke that I think it is on fire, I may ram you off the road for the safety of other drivers.  Fake bullet holes aren't cool.  If you went to the same school as me, please don't put our alumni plates on a 1987 K-car.   I can read that, but I can't back up because I'm stopped at a light.  Wear your seatbelt so it doesn't cost so much to fix you when you crash.  Young people: you can't drive.  Old People: you can't drive.  Please sit up when you drive, lie down when you get home.  I'll stop now.  

[AngieB]

Wow. Common sense. How refreshing. Too bad the morons that need to see this won't.

[RecycleMichael]

Quote from Cannon Fodder..."I have never been in an accident while driving..."

I can't wait to run into you...tell me where you will be driving so I can aim for your car...

[grahambino]

someone that stops to merge onto a freeway...ive been behind a couple of these knuckledraggers a few times now.  it would be funny if it werent so dangerous.    

[tulsacyclist]

What a great post..

[cannon_fodder]

quote:Originally posted by recyclemichael
I can't wait to run into you...tell me where you will be driving so I can aim for your car...

Now play nice!  I drive a white Ford Crown Victory marked "POLICE" (Property of Life Insurance Committee Executive) that for some reason came with lights on the roof.  Ram away. []

[RecycleMichael]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder
Ram away.

How did you know I drive a Dodge Ram pickup truck?

[Conan71]

quote:Originally posted by grahambino

someone that stops to merge onto a freeway...ive been behind a couple of these knuckledraggers a few times now.  it would be funny if it werent so dangerous.    

The entrance ramp just before Lewis onto eastbound BA.  I count on it at least twice a week.  They speed up to get to the top of the ramp, I slow to allow them in, then they slow to a freaking crawl.

I feel like taking cast-off boiler tubes and welding them to the front and right side of my truck in a fashion like a cattle catcher on a steam locomotive to deal with these idiots.

CF-

Item 16: When driving on a four lane turnpike, or highway, the left lane is for passing only, not to pull out and be a turd that backs up traffic or speeds up and rams other cars into the tail pipe of the slow-poke in front of them in the right lane.

Flashing high beams from the vehicle behind you in the fast lane means get over, flashing high beams from the vehicle you just passed in the right lane means it's safe to merge back to the right lane where you belong.  [!][!]

Item 17: Just because you have seen Tony Stewart or Jeff Gordon bump draft on TV doesn't mean you can do it on streets or highways.

Item 18: Don't cut me off with two inches to spare, remember what that cattle catcher is for on the front of my truck.

And finally, when did BMW, Mercedes, and Lexus quit equipping their cars with turn signals?

[jambalyajoe]

quote:Originally posted by cannon_fodder

I am not an expert.

12) Bicycles.  
You are not a car.  I appreciate that rules allow you to operate on the roads under normal traffic laws.  However, I remind you again that you are not a car.  If you are not capable of going the stated speed limit please get the over so I may pass.  Thanks for saving the world, but don�t slow me down while you do it.  This rule applies to biker Foxes as well as cycling Santas.

In the same vein, why don't you just signal LEFT, change lanes, and pass in the adjacent lane?  I don't seem to have a problem with either the biker foxes and the cycling Santas on the Broken Arrow Expressway.  In fact, I kinda enjoy the break from the routine of sitting endlessly in a long line of cars in front of me on Memorial.

Seeing Santa blast down the BA, with his arms raised high, with all manner of cars, trucks, and 18-wheelers rolling thunder all over the place is nothing short of AMAZING!  How does Santa do it?  Amazing, just amazing!

Everybody can see Santa a mile away in front of them.  Before I even get close, I've changed lanes.  You know Santa's NOT gonna go any faster and he's NOT giving up his lane.  

What really pisses me off are the dumb idiots who go right up behind him, stuck behind him, and expect ME to give them room to pull out in front of me.  If you are too stupid to change lanes early and get stuck behind Santa, you probably deserve to wet your pants while waiting too long for your turn to change lanes.

What's your problem?  Do you own the road just because you have four wheels, instead of two?  Sounds to me you are the one who needs Driver's Ed 101.

[Ed W]

12) Bicycles.
"You are not a car. I appreciate that rules allow you to operate on the roads under normal traffic laws. However, I remind you again that you are not a car. If you are not capable of going the stated speed limit please get the over so I may pass. Thanks for saving the world, but don't slow me down while you do it. This rule applies to biker Foxes as well as cycling Santas."

Aww, I feel your pain.  Meanwhile, you can watch my fat, black-spandex clad donkey until it's SAFE to pass since we both know it's the overtaking motorist's responsibility to do so safely.  So you wait until the on-coming lane is clear, then pass with at least 3 feet of separation between us.  That's not difficult.  Crisis averted.

Move along, move along.  Nothing to see here.

[azbadpuppy]

LMAO- good post.

[tulsa1603]

Great post!

Until I went to college, I hadn't spent much time in OKC...so imagine my surprise/disgust, when I realized that almost EVERYONE there stops at the end of entrance ramps.  It's a maddening epidemic, at least it was from 1994-1999.

Also, I think the turn signal is greatly under appreciated.  On my way to work down 15th, i usually get stuck behind people at Lewis and Utica who think that they don't have to turn their turn signals on to make that left turn until the light turns green, so you are stuck sitting behind them, usually through an entire light cycle.

[Breadburner]

quote:Originally posted by Ed W

12) Bicycles.
"You are not a car. I appreciate that rules allow you to operate on the roads under normal traffic laws. However, I remind you again that you are not a car. If you are not capable of going the stated speed limit please get the over so I may pass. Thanks for saving the world, but don't slow me down while you do it. This rule applies to biker Foxes as well as cycling Santas."

Aww, I feel your pain.  Meanwhile, you can watch my fat, black-spandex clad donkey until it's SAFE to pass since we both know it's the overtaking motorist's responsibility to do so safely.  So you wait until the on-coming lane is clear, then pass with at least 3 feet of separation between us.  That's not difficult.  Crisis averted.

Move along, move along.  Nothing to see here.

On this I agree with Ed....

[Conan71]

quote:Originally posted by tulsa1603

Great post!

Until I went to college, I hadn't spent much time in OKC...so imagine my surprise/disgust, when I realized that almost EVERYONE there stops at the end of entrance ramps.  It's a maddening epidemic, at least it was from 1994-1999.

Also, I think the turn signal is greatly under appreciated.  On my way to work down 15th, i usually get stuck behind people at Lewis and Utica who think that they don't have to turn their turn signals on to make that left turn until the light turns green, so you are stuck sitting behind them, usually through an entire light cycle.

I don't get the idea of the "ambush" left turn signal at stop lights w/o left turn lanes.  Why keep it a secret to the last second and bottle up people behind you?

The other pisser is the folks who pull up to an intersection with a no left turn sign clearly displayed, then act as if they are blind and deaf as the cars behind them honk to move along instead of attempting an illegal left turn.

[cannon_fodder]

jambalyajoe, Ed W, Breadburner, Biker Foxes and Paul Taes:

I am capable of seeing the amusement of seeing a cycling Santa in July that will dance naked for $1.  It amuses me.  Even though his most common performance place is my commuter route near the BA on Harvard, it is still more amusing that frustrating.  It fact, this entire post was meant to be more amusing than serious.

However, my point still stands.  While I understand and stated that cyclists have rights on the road, it would be courteous to try and avoid slowing down traffic.  I biked to law school, work, or the bar building many, many days for 3+ years... so I feel your pain when people are bing jerks.  However, more often than not I took side streets so as to not slow traffic down on Harvard and/or get myself killed.

and I have never seen Biker Fox cause any sort of trouble in traffic, I have just never had a chance to bring him up in a post before so I had to take the opportunity.  

http://youtube.com/results?search_query=bikerfox&search=Search
http://www.bikerfox.com/

be afraid, be very afraid.  []