A bit of fun

[Ed W]

I've been listening to an audio book version of The Hunger Games after seeing the film.  Normally, I think books are far better than the movie adaptations, but in this case it's not true.  The book was intended for a young adult audience - think mid-teens - so it includes a copious amount of teenage angst, so much that it makes the book ripe for parody.  The usual advice to authors is "show rather than tell" and in this case I don't really need to know everything happening inside the head of a sixteen-year-old girl.

While it's true that numerous Hunger Games parodies exist, they're mainly videos.  Text is the only way to get inside someone's thoughts.  And when those thoughts go off the rails...


David sat to her left at the her family's dinner table, slightly nervous about dining with her mom and dad, especially since her dad said little and glared a lot.

"Would you like some biscuits?" she asked.  "I made them myself and they're not from a mix.  I made them from scratch."

"Uh, no," he replied.  "I'm good."

She wondered what he meant by that.  Did he genuinely not want her biscuits, or was it something far more subtle?  He had been distant the last few days.  She'd seen him talking with that minx, Olivia, too.  That girl was trouble.  They were enemies from the third grade, so maybe she had enticed him.  That's it!  He was going to break up with her and start seeing Olivia!  Her heart sank even as she reached for the mashed potatoes.

The food was tasteless but she went on eating in a mechanical way, her eyes focused on the center of the table.  She stared at the roast, avoiding eye contact with anyone.  Her thoughts raced.  David was the perfect boyfriend, or so it seemed.  He was courteous and thoughtful with old-school manners instilled by his own parents.  But she realized that under the polished exterior he was treacherous and deceitful.  How could she have been such a fool to fall for his lies?

"I made a peach cobbler for dessert, too.  Would you like a piece?" She managed to get the question out in a normal voice without revealing the rage she felt at his betrayal.

"Uh, no," he said.  "I'm pretty full."

She casually picked up a steak knife and drove it into his chest.