RecycleMichael
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« Reply #15 on: December 30, 2008, 12:54:36 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by zstyles
Okay...everyone...the topic wasn't about the bible..it was about channel 8 and asking this poll question..try to not be so ADD...
I only wish I could... You started a thread for making fun of puff topic covered by a TV station during the holidays. What is wrong with doing a poll asking people's opinions on something trivial? It was interesting enough to catch your attention. When I saw the news story, it reminded me that they were open so it was good advertising...maybe that was the real intent... Why would this poll be any different than asking people about sports or are they driving to grandma's house? Back to the bible conversation...I am actually learning and now have a list of 39 things I may use as New Year's resolutions.
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Power is nothing till you use it.
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cannon_fodder
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« Reply #16 on: December 30, 2008, 01:34:03 pm » |
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All things in moderation. Including moderation. So I plan on getting hammered tomorrow night in order to accomplish the goal of moderation.
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- - - - - - - - - I crush grooves.
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pmcalk
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« Reply #17 on: December 30, 2008, 01:44:11 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by cannon_fodder
I'll assume you are being in jest... but the reasoning is:
God told us to remember the Sabbath. On the 7th day he rested. Our work is not as important as his, so clearly we should not work either. In addition, Jews were slaves in Egypt who worked 7 days a week - not working on the 7th day is supposed to be a reminder that they are free.
To be precise, "work" is not forbidden by the bible but "melachah" is. A word best translated as "work" but having a specific connotation. It has since been extrapolated by various holy men. Specifically, Jews observing Shabbat must not engage in:
1. Sowing 2. Plowing (there's a joke here) 3. Reaping 4. Binding sheaves 5. Threshing 6. Winnowing 7. Selecting 8. Grinding 9. Sifting 10. Kneading 11. Baking 12. Shearing wool 13. Washing wool 14. Beating wool 15. Dyeing wool 16. Spinning 17. Weaving 18. Making two loops 19. Weaving two threads 20. Separating two threads 21. Tying 22. Untying 23. Sewing two stitches 24. Tearing 25. Trapping 26. Slaughtering 27. Flaying 28. Salting meat 29. Curing hide 30. Scraping hide 31. Cutting hide up 32. Writing two letters 33. Erasing two letters 34. Building 35. Tearing a building down 36. Extinguishing a fire 37. Kindling a fire 38. Hitting with a hammer 39. Taking an object from the private domain to the public, or transporting an object in the public domain.
#39 pertaining to driving whilst not predicting the automobile (or did it...). []
The fun being most of that isn't actually IN the bible, it was kinda-sorta added later. Like Christmas. Hence, Walgreens should be closed.
Quod erat demonstrandum.
I have always thought that strict adherence to the 39 rules results in some fairly odd traditions. For example, since electricity is like fire, you cannot "create it", though you can use it. If your lights are on a timer, that's fine, so long as you don't turn the light on. You can put your food on a warming tray, but you cannot cook it. There are "kosher" hotels in Israel that have elevators that stop on every floor on Saturdays so you don't have to push a button. I really never understood that. God doesn't mind you riding on an elevator, so long as you don't push a button??? What doesn't God have against buttons? I think we should all observe one day a week where we aren't consumed with consuming things (not that it should be imposed on private businesses, though). But my kids think that's sacrilege.
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RecycleMichael
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« Reply #18 on: December 30, 2008, 02:46:57 pm » |
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We have church for only about five more Sundays (Our Lady of the NFL). Our 32 cathedrals are the biggest in the world, some seating as many as 80,000 people.
Our choir uses pom-poms and our congregation prays for touchdowns and opposing team fumbles.
One of our teams has already been named Saints.
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Power is nothing till you use it.
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Gaspar
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« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2008, 03:14:01 pm » |
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I'm a member of the Church of Home Depot. I take my daughter every Sunday. My wife feels that I tithe too much, and I always have to remind her of the verses:
Vila 12:13-15
13 And the profit Bob Vila Said unto the people. Thy drill is comfortable to hold and features a 1/2 in. single-sleeve keyless chuck and a Mag Tray™ magnetic holder for screws and bits. Thy circular saw has a 5-1/2 in. carbide-tipped blade. The 0-3,000 spm reciprocating saw ensures accurate starts and smooth cutting to produce holy results. Each piece is handheld for versatile use in limited spaces. Thy included tool bag makes storage and transport to the jobsite hassle-free.
14 If Thou art worthy, thou shalt receive a single Ryobi One+ Tool by retailer's mail-in rebate. May not be combined with any other offer.
15 If thou lookist to upgrade to a serious combo kit thow can call off thy search. The new RYOBI® 18V Lithium-ion AutoShift™ Drill is the blessed of a four-piece combo kit ideal for the holy DIYer.
AMEN
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When attacked by a mob of clowns, always go for the juggler.
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Ibanez
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« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2008, 04:15:26 pm » |
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I Don't Roll on Shabbas
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Hoss
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« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2008, 04:31:24 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by Gaspar
I'm a member of the Church of Home Depot. I take my daughter every Sunday. My wife feels that I tithe too much, and I always have to remind her of the verses:
Vila 12:13-15
13 And the profit Bob Vila Said unto the people. Thy drill is comfortable to hold and features a 1/2 in. single-sleeve keyless chuck and a Mag Tray™ magnetic holder for screws and bits. Thy circular saw has a 5-1/2 in. carbide-tipped blade. The 0-3,000 spm reciprocating saw ensures accurate starts and smooth cutting to produce holy results. Each piece is handheld for versatile use in limited spaces. Thy included tool bag makes storage and transport to the jobsite hassle-free.
14 If Thou art worthy, thou shalt receive a single Ryobi One+ Tool by retailer's mail-in rebate. May not be combined with any other offer.
15 If thou lookist to upgrade to a serious combo kit thow can call off thy search. The new RYOBI® 18V Lithium-ion AutoShift™ Drill is the blessed of a four-piece combo kit ideal for the holy DIYer.
AMEN
We don't agree on much Gas, but on this we will agree. That was friggin' classic hilarity. Good stuff.
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Libertarianism is a system of beliefs for people who think adolescence is the epitome of human achievement.
Global warming isn't real because it was cold today. Also great news: world famine is over because I just ate - Stephen Colbert.
Somebody find Guido an ambulance to chase...
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Sardonicus Rex
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« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2008, 05:53:25 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by zstyles
Survey today: Should Stores Like Walgreens Be Open On Christmas.....
errrr huh? I think they can decide their own hours...correct? This is still America..whats the point of this poll!!???
http://cfc.ktul.com/processpoll.cfm?i=2268&showresults=1
Flash polls are one of the most useless features on KTUL's (or any other news organization's) Web site. My blood pressure immediately goes off the scale every time a news anchor asks the (usually inane) question of the day. Who gives a [insert colorful word of your choice here] what anybody thinks when a question can be answered simply by clicking a button or selecting from 3 or 4 set responses?
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pmcalk
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« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2008, 06:35:36 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by Sardonicus Rex
quote: Originally posted by zstyles
Survey today: Should Stores Like Walgreens Be Open On Christmas.....
errrr huh? I think they can decide their own hours...correct? This is still America..whats the point of this poll!!???
http://cfc.ktul.com/processpoll.cfm?i=2268&showresults=1
Flash polls are one of the most useless features on KTUL's (or any other news organization's) Web site. My blood pressure immediately goes off the scale every time a news anchor asks the (usually inane) question of the day.
Who gives a [insert colorful word of your choice here] what anybody thinks when a question can be answered simply by clicking a button or selecting from 3 or 4 set responses?
I think the flash polls should at least be more truthful: "what do people who have no life & nothing better to do with their time than to participate in flash polls think of this topic?"
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Red Arrow
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« Reply #24 on: December 30, 2008, 10:44:02 pm » |
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quote: Originally posted by pmcalk
I think the flash polls should at least be more truthful: "what do people who have no life & nothing better to do with their time than to participate in flash polls think of this topic?"
I never participate in those polls just so I can say I have a life and something better to do. (Some may disagree.) Oh, wait a minute. What are we doing here?
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tim huntzinger
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« Reply #25 on: December 31, 2008, 08:35:03 am » |
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quote: Originally posted by zstyles
Okay...everyone...try to not be so ADD...
Putin won that 'pectoral' poll on Drudge. I want better pecs. I think Madoff is a criminal against humanity. Can we have him executed on a Sunday?
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Quinton
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« Reply #26 on: December 31, 2008, 08:56:38 am » |
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why do you try to make others believe as you do ?? isnt this a country where you are free to believe as you want or have i missed a change in the constitution.
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Liberalism is a mental disorder
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