Whats changed? Are people moving back into midtown, instead of the burbs?
Downtown and midtown are very popular. Price per square foot is far higher in those areas than the burbs. But plenty of subdivisions being thrown up still... BA has gone up ~40k in population while you were out. Jenks and Bixby have doubled. Owasso is a thing now.
High paying jobs? (Besides oil and gas)
Citgo left town. SemGroup went bankrupt. Hilti is leaving. Boeing closed their Tulsa operations. Dollar General was bought by Hertz. The Ford glass plant went bankrupt. BizJet is shutting down their luxury jet division. And Williams was just bought. Our economic model is to provide low regulation, low taxes, and cheap labor. So... (but unemployment is low and we have great entrepreneurs!)
Shopping?
We have many new strip malls in the aforementioned suburbs. There is also this new thing called Amazon.
There are a few cool new shops downtown and in the Brookside area. Ida Red, Decopolis, and Dwelling Spaces come to mind. They are building a new retail development downtown out of shipping containers downtown.
River has water?
For the low-low price of $250mil it can... vote coming up next year. But Turkey Mountain has turned into a busy recreational area and is free!
Nightlife?
Brookside and Cherry Street still rocking it - but so is the Blue Dome district and the Brady District. The BOK Center gathers headlining concerts from around the world. Cain's has AC now... and is also a top venue in the country for smaller acts. Downtown BA has also come alive, calling it the Rose District (all those building they wanted to clear in the 1990s).
Crime?
It still exists, generally same patterns. But since you left the Tulsa police faced several Federal indictments, a few officers have been arrested for murder/rape/ect., and the Tulsa County Sheriff was indicated by a grand jury and recently resigned. So, umm, progress?
Welcome home.
[re-reading this post it is NOT a glowing endorsement. Things really are better than when you left!]
[edit] fixed typo, still worked in the plug![/edit]